Tag Archive | United States

STEAMIN’, PREENIN’ AND ALL THINGS SPRING CLEANIN’

Happy 152 Pony Express Birthday!  Who’d have thunk horses would some day by left in the postal dust n dirt for email and tweeting!  Speaking of dust and dirt here I am rehearsing for a TV tour tomorrow with some terrific companies I’m working with to help us get rid of dust and dirt like:

  • Stanley Steemer whom I’ve now got on speed dial since I’ve also discovered they not only deep clean and sanitize carpets but also hardwood floors, upholstery, tile and grout,
  • My buds at TIDE and their oh so cool new single unit dose Tide Pods which are idiot and mess proof and can be used in a HE or non HE washing machine
  • LG and their new LG TurboWash Washing Machine which will save us 20 minutes per load EVEN on large loads …and with us averaging nearly 400 loads a laundry per year think about all the free time we’ll gain…LOVE THAT!

And, Chase’s Freedom card is gonna help us earn 5% back on up to $1500 through June when I shop for my spring cleaning supplies or anything else I buy at the grocery store.

Oh, yeah I’m also gonna get a makeover…Mobile Makeover that is courtesy of Radio Shack…where you can trade in your old working phone for anywhere from $30-300 instantly for store credit…Think it’s time to pony up and express myself with a new iPhone 4S!  … Hope you’ll tune in!

Spread the glove!

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MARC ANTHONY, WILLY NELSON ‘N I WANNA KNOW: DOES UNCLE SAM SPEAK PRADA?

I confess I have never done my taxes…not as in didn’t file them which will have the IRS  knocking on my door in about 30 seconds ‘n moi perhaps learning how to knit with my cell mate a la Martha Stewart‘. Nope, in years past I chose to have ‘professionals’  figure out how to give Uncle Sam his fair share of my hard earned income.

And, when you think about it many famous folks like Marc AnthonyWillie Nelson; The Osbornes; and Ja Rule  Slide10.aspx have tried to decide what they think is fair and have not faired well. But, as one of my all time fave performers James Taylor reminds us “You can run, but you can not hide” : 

And, though he was talking about love, the IRS -damn them-eventually finds us whether we’re in New Jersey, Beverly Hills or sippin Pina Coladas on a beach in the tax-free Caymans.

Anyway, this year I’m doing most of the work since like 99.9% of us, I’m trying to cut back on my expenses.  So no more lawyer like accounting firm with 15 partners letting the meter run even when they’re boasting about THEIR kids. Yup this year it’s mostly me.  As a result, I now understand why so many accountants are bald as I’m pulling my hair out and rubbing my head simulaneously trying to  figure out where the hell my money went and how to organize all this s…t 🙂  

It’s truly a humbling experience and made me feel a bit like Rebecca Bloomwood from the best selling book and fun albeit silly movie: Confessions of a Shopaholic which I coincidentally watched last weekend.  The movie starred Isla fisher.  For those who’ve neither read nor seen it, the title pretty much says it all…’cept for girl meets very rich handsome boy whom is her boss, they fall in love, girl lies to him then joins Shoppers Anonoymous, and boy recounts cause afterall love conquers all particularly in the movies…The End.

Anyway, trivial as the movie was it did make me realize how we can easily let things get out of control with our finances…And, in her case with her credit cards which launched her path to becoming a shopoholic at the ripe ole age of 7…

Fast forward 20 years she takes a job at a place where she is asked to help other people save money by writing a financial column.  Clearly in over her head, she decides to relate buying investments to buying shoes…quite an analogy but one that works and her column becomes a huge success…as i said this was a silly albeit fun movie/book.  So as I have been working on my taxes all well and about to loose it, I decided to take to writing this blog hoping it will help me sort through all this stuff.  And, in the spirit of Rebecca’s debut column, I am going forth and approaching doing and organizing my taxes as I would do my closet:  One line item and one pair of shoes, pants and shopping bags at a time labeled: ‘Drop 10’ (as in pounds and bills); Discard (cut the excess) and Donate (an always tax deduction)!    So there I confess and hope Uncle Sam speaks Prada too!  Spread the glove! 

GETTING INTO THE GROOVE WITH SPRING ALIVE AND ABBOTT ‘N COSTELLO

Last eve my best bud Marla, Franky, Doug and  I ventured into NYC to see an Off Off Off B’way musical called Spring Alive starring Spring Groove (I know quite a name!) which I learned about and saw thanks to Mamma Drama NY’s co-owners Erin Leigh Peck and Holly Fink.  

The show is a one act, one person terrific musical  of one Jewish woman’s journey/evolution from a typical NY gal to a rasta haired Yogi ….Or as the booklet described, its the ‘sing, pray, love’ version of  the wonderful book, “Eat, Pray, Love“.  Marla loved it and could relate totally as she’s a certified Yoga instructor.  I on the other hand am not a Yoga person and though I have dabbled in it my idea of doing The Sun Breath or Crouching Dog Position(forgive me if I’ve got the name of that pose wrong) is to crouch on my couch breathing in the bouquet of a fine wine..But i love theatre and particularly entertainment that elevates and inspires which is exactly what Spring did…along with an ensemble of dancers who brought another level of calm, grace and energy to the production.

o

Spring de joie...love those pants want a pair

But part of the fun of the eve was simply trying to find the theatre after eating at a hip enough restaurant called “Inoteca” located on the Lower East Side of Manhattan. Not only was the food and wine terrific but Marla and I agreed that the lighting was perfect too:  as in low enough to make one look good no matter how tired or over 30 you are!

Anyway,  pleasantly stuffed and with a slight buzz on ’twas time to find the theatre…As you may be aware NYC is filled with theaters all over the place and peeps trying to make it here cause as  Liza Minnelli has sung time ‘n time again if “You make it here, you’ll make it anywhere.  It’s up to you .New York. New York”. And, while most of us are familiar with Broadway shows and some off broadway hits like “The Fantastics“, there are lots of hopeful gems like Spring Alive which are Off Off Off Broadway.  And, for we New Jerseyians who were off, off, off our beaten path, we couldn’t find  the theatre since it had a dual address: Dawson Place and 179 A Christie Street. So as time tick ticked and we walked up and down the street again and again, each of us taking turns asking ‘where’s dawson”, “who said it was on Christie” , I felt like we were somehow living a version of Abbott & Costello‘s famous baseball routine “who’s on first?”

Now, past 8:00 and curtain time, we decided  to call for help. Marla buzzed her son  Zach whom lives nearby and is, I might add, the coolest twenty something year ole, successful hard-working hipster living the NYC dream that I know and have known since he was five. Well, within seconds,  Zach quickly pointed us in the right direction which was  right across the street from where we were standing!!!

But we weren’t home free yet since being late we were directed to the back stage entrance.  As we went down the stairs, I began to get that ‘something’s not right here’ feeling, and did my own version of crouching dog laughing when I saw that the next door said “Stage Members Only”.   At this point, my wine buzz now a distant memory, we decided to throw caution to the wind and hope the door didn’t lead us to Spring on stage and our Off Off Off Broadway debut.  Well, the good news is it didn’t.  Nope it led us onto the balcony and we took our seats without disturbing anyone.  Within seconds we settled into the calm and got into the Groove with Spring. And, the rest as they say is Namasta…Spread the glove!


AAAHHS, TEARS ‘N TATOOS FROM THE MOTHER- HOOD:)

Bittersweet kinda day today…Went to Luke’s school this morning since they wanted to take photos of him signing his letter of acceptance to Bucknell University which he’ll be attending in the fall and tears came to my eyes (and continue as i write this).

Though more then proud of him and that he’ll be going to a terrif school and for him, more importantly, he’ll be the king fish on their golf team, but for me it’s pretty black and white : My not so little boy is leaving the nest…As parents we always know someday our kids will leave…someday which seems soooo so far away. Then wham bam thank you mam the years go by and they’ve gone from diapers to departing for college…And, a flood of emotions and snapshots are unleashed…And, for me one shot came to mind of Luke and I sitting in an empty kiddie pool in our backyard, reading books and laughing that simple wonderful pure, special moment kinda laugh.

One pix worth 1000 words 🙂

Another thing came to mind too…I think i’ve shared i’m divorced but fortunately Luke’s dad and i have a terrific relationship (at least if you ask me, he might have a different take!) What I haven’t shared is that he’s an amazing lyricist who wooed me during our courtship with a song that to this day remains unfinished …hmmm 🙂  At any rate last Mother’s Day he and his partner wrote an amazing song “Motherhood“. It captured then and even more so now so many of the feelings I’m experiencing and I suspect many of you will relate no matter what your child’s age is .  And, yes have some hankies within reach cause it’s gonna pull at your heartstrings in a really good way.

And, now here he is all grown up, shaving, driving, towering over me, mom and dad no longer the only centers of his universe.  He does still on occasion hug me and tell me how much he appreciates and loves me without prodding nor when he needs money so long as none of his peers are around.  And, though he’ll probably want to disown me for saying this –every nite I still go into his room (if the door’s not closed and he’s facebooking all is buds) to give him a kiss good nite.

I know a lot of parents sorta look forward to their kids leaving .  And, though I won’t necessarily miss being overloaded with his laundry; searching for his bedroom floor since it’s covered in a meritage of clothes, shoes and stuff i prefer remain anonymous (much more pleasant way to describe it and makes me think of wine me not ‘whine’ about it LOL); nor his shouting ‘mom there’s nothinng in this house to eat’… I’m gonna miss Luke BIG time …To quote Agatha Christie  “A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world”. I need not say more…

So exito stage right for moi …i’m done for now… Bird‘s gotta fly and so do i …actually I’m also leaving the nest and flying south but that’s another’s day blog!  Thanks for letting me ramble,  feel free to do so back.  And, here’s the signing pix with all and Dan Brown, Athletic Coach (standing behind me). Proud we all be!! But we miss Coach Aug mucho!!

Go Bucko! Missin' the kiddie pool 🙂

And, thanks H for Luke  and a song that is tatooed on my heart. xo

Spread the glove !

PUNXSUTAWNEY PHIL AND PRESIDENTIAL POLITICS

Happy Ground Hog day!  Don’t you just love the movie with Bill Murray! I can watch that flick over and over again which guess makes sense!

A few years back I had a Ground Hog Eve party to celebrate Punxsutawney Phil‘s big day  and gave folks play dough to sculp their own ground hog which you can imagine after cocktailing what their works of art looked like! Of course here in the Northeast I was expecting Phil to greet us with sunglasses and flip flops sharing summer is 6 weeks away given our mild winter but alas he was in his normal attire and saw his shadow so 6 more weeks ’til spring we go tra la…

So Phil time to start spring cleaning?

And, for those of you who hadn’t heard it I also wanted to share how Ground Hog Day and the presidential election have overlapped this year courtesy of Mitt Romney‘s now semi famous quote last week about President Obama’s presidency while campaigning in florida:   “This has been a Groundhog Day presidency. He keeps saying the same things and we keep waking up with the same things going on. Nothing changes. He keeps saying these great things he’s going to do and, yet, it’s the same picture every single morning,” Romney said to a crowd of about 200 in Jacksonville, Florida late last week according to ABC News. “It’s been a Groundhog Day presidency and that’s going to end if I’m president.”

And, forgive me but in my mind the entire presidential election process is like groundhog day or rather groundhog year and I’d like to crawl back in my hole like Phil and wait it out!  Spread the glove!

LEWES, BREWS ‘N HOLIDAY REVUES!

WOW! Can u believe the holidays are over?  I can’t say that they came and went and I wasn’t in the moment.  Nope for the first time in eons I actually can look back and not quote John Lennon about ‘life’s what’s happening when you’re busy making plans”. . . I made plans and I was living them! That’s not to say I didn’t work a bit, stress a bit and not take as much time as Sir D might have preferred though he tempted and spoiled me in far too many ways for which I am mucho grateful…but overall I chilled and cheered (perhaps a tad too much) my way through the holidays!

And,  it all started with my Mary Tyler Moore tour of NYC (DEC. 5) following the gig with Kathie Lee ‘n Hoda on the Today Show—And BTW, yours truly is back with my fave gals next Tuesday, January 10th to share tips n’ tricks for those of us who got suckered into getting our kiddies a new pet and now are paying our doo…n cleaning it too!

But that’s another day’s blog to share…For a few more brief moments before my dinner needs to be on the table, another load of laundry done and my head hits the pillow so I can be up with the roosters to insure my son is not late for school, I am still in holiday happy mode.  And, I wanted to share  a few pix with all of ye from Crossing the Delaware via Ferry in Biz Mode to tourin’ n tastin’ D Beer at Dogfish Head Brewery to D hospitality n oh so charmin’  Inn at Cove Bay in Lewes, DE to the incredible ‘n yummy Holiday eve courtesy of chef extraordinaire Peter Kelly at X2o n his incredibly talented bro Ned Kelly…And, last but far from least –to D’man SSD Tank ye mucho xoxo!  

Please, please NOTE! I’d love to see your pix too so please share here at LiveFromHysteriaLane, tweet or FB me! Happy New Year all! Spread the glove 🙂 

FERRY BIZ-ZY

 

WINING N DINING IN DELAWARE

TAKIN CONTROL AT DOGFISH HEAD BREWERY, Lewes DE


TAH -DAH MY VERY OWN DOGFISH BREW! oops,makes u see sideways LOL!

 

D'ELF 🙂

NJOYIN 12 NITES W/UBER TALENTED NED KELLEY/X20-Photo by D'man

MMMUMS THE WORD AT X20-What a Hoot!

GEORGE CLOONEY, McDREAMY ‘n MOI: See You Same Time, Next Year!

It’s the most wonderful time of the year”…yes it tis the holidays and as Andy Williams croons in this classic Xmas tune , it’s also the hap happiest season of all.

And for me, its also the pap papiest time of year when I get to see my gynecologist whom Ive had a crush on since I first met him 18 years ago due to my miscarriage.  There I was  looking stunning in my hospital gown, eyes puffy from crying and nose red from blowing.  Yes, five pokes in my arm later courtesy of an inept nurse who could not find a vein worthy for the intravenous line, there he stood:  My McDreamy who has a smile like George Clooney (who has Dr. roots from ye ole ER!), holding my hand telling me all would be ok as my then husband lay passed out on the chair woozy from watching Nurse Ratched  (from classic film, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest) use his beloved wife as a push pin.

And, McDreamy was correcto since a year and 38 hours later I gave birth via a C-section to a healthy 22 inch, 8 pound baby boy OUCH! Once again, their George McDreamy stood holding my hand, this time yours truly looking even more alluring then when we first met -adorned with body fluids that only our septic tank should witness.  He smiled that cute little smile and sweetly assured me not to worry and all would be ok.  And, once again there was my hubs sitting on the side, nearly passed out, woozy from seeing my blood, sweat and tears.

And, thats how this now 18-year-old relationship began. Its sorta like the movie Same Time Next Year where Alan Alda and Ellen Bursytn meet at a romantic inn, both married and have an adulterous affair same time every year for 26 years sharing a rainbow of emotions

Well McDreamy and I havent exactly shared a rainbow of emotions-pain yes, but anyone whos seen you looking like a character from tales from the crypt and delivers the most important thing in your life is someone whom you will always share a special connection and fondness.  So when its our ‘annual date we always greet each other with a warm hug, catch up on family and kids, I show him pix of Luke, we talk about career, politics, biking, swimming and books weve read. Then its time to get me in the saddle so to speak 🙂

PLEASE NOTE: Unlike the movie, there is no impropriety on either of our part though I confess the thought has crossed my mind but I also have fantasies of Brad Pitt, Bradley Cooper, Hugh Jackman and George Clooney.  Nope McDreamy is all businessDamn it!! Kidding!!And, btw I promised him I wouldnt use his name just in case someone got the wrong idea but tis nice to dream vs. scream during these moments!  Im sure you get how it makes it a lot easier to endure the discomfort of being in those stirrups and having your insides feel like their being extracted during for the exam and pap culture. 

Now you know why Im of good cheer and why this is the pap-pappiest time of my yearAnd, of course knowing all is fine with my bod will make me even happier! 

A bientot my McDreamy.  Cant wait to see you same time next year!  Happy Holidays!

Love as always to hear any of your McDreamy tales etc here, or FB or tweet moi! Spread the glove…hmmm not in the doctoral sense LOL!